today was chemistry
the overall paper is eighty marks
i didn't attempt thirty three marks

i want to wallow in self pity and i am. it's been so long since i felt this way.no one knows how it feels, how i feel.

am still alive at 6:50 AM



random excerpt:


i am not the most optismistic person in the world. in fact, i'm hell lot a pessimist. but sometimes, the rainbow colors of life cannot be ignored. we all possess something and lack of some too; we live on the border of a dull world and a colorful world so much so that we can choose to wallow in self pity or celebrate the little we have. today, i think i prefer to turn my head towards the brighter side because, there's only so much time we have to life. :D

am still alive at 2:40 AM



Body aching, mental fatigue, mind spinning, i'm practically paralysed and disabled to carry out any form of revision. oh my, don't i sound like i mugged a lot? In short, i'm just suffering from laziness and some sort of self delusion which is plain sad at this point of time.

While i (try to) slog my youth away doing work, i wonder how i ever will get the answers for those questions i don't know (and that makes up to more than half the total questions). With those unsolvable riddles staring back at me, my mind is trying to hypnotise me to sleep.

omg, life is so irritating. :(

while i may sound stressed or even emo, i might as well just continue my laments. when we misses things in the past so so much, i wonder if that means we hate our current situations? Can we love to go back to the past and love to stay in the present at the same time?

maybe they should just merge sec sch and jc together. how wonderful.

and oh, i found some sort of an old diary from somewhere in my house. Perhaps, we all lived in fairytales during our innocent times.

so who's the mean person who woke us up >:(



am still alive at 4:48 AM



buzz buzz buzz
time's not stopping for me anymore

kaye tagged me for this, and being a nice person (okay, don't argue) i'm doing this. haha
EACH PLAYER OF THIS GAME STARTS OFF WITH 10 WEIRD THINGS, HABITS, OR LITTLE KNOWN FACTS ABOUT ONESELF. PEOPLE WHO GET TAGGED MUST WRITE IN THEIR BLOG 10 WEIRD THINGS, HABITS, OR FACTS, AS WELL AS STATE THIS RULE CLEARLY. AT THE END, YOU MUST CHOOSE SIX PEOPLE TO BE TAGGED AND LIST THEIR NAMES. NO TAG-BACKS!

; i'm only used to landing with my left foot first when using the escalator
; when i have a lot of things to do or when i feel very busy, i tend to go to sleep
; when i have money, spending always come first, then saving (which is impossible)
; i have the tendency to stop talking halfway through my sentences
; i like to think a lot, and may blurt out talking to myself
; i want to fly (LOLS)
; i can be anti-social (yes jamie yes)
; i listen to all kinds of music from broadway to rock and metal

wahlao, this thing is too long. i'm too tired to think of any more 'weird' things and this thing is sure making me feel like i'm indeed a weird person. hahaa. no tagging of anyone.

been out quite often nowadays
gosh, i can barely open my eyes

am still alive at 8:13 AM



everytime I feel like blogging, the blogger page will hang. When I finally get to this page, i get kind of speechless. like now.

I'm feeling very random now, and after reading suhui's post, I'm feeling like twice as random. haha.

Is it like overrated to say i miss my peeps. hell, i haven't seen some of them for ages! Soon, maybe i will start dreaming of them :D

I know, I know the-days-which-shall-not-be-named, aka CTs are arriving at the speed of light. I kind of enjoy staying at all home all day, if only I'm studying 24/7. nahh, I'm not that nerd. maybe just not yet. lol. Even though I know I will regret like SHIT afterwards because I'm not really mugging but you know, no mood means NO MOOD. stupid brains.

And there are always news of conflict on headlines or on the tv. What's wrong with these people anyway!? First in Gaza, and then South thailand and and, not to mention LTTE striking here and there. Yucks, so many innocent deaths. I always thought the whole world should like Singapore; not that we don't fight, we can hardly fight openly here. haha. Why am I so bothered by it anyway!? rarr PEACE!

more days ahead to rot
hell, even my mother is asking why i'm like...glued to home.

edit//

JAMIE LAI (till now you havent told me the chinese pronounciation -.-)
i'm right now blogging about you, aren't you honoured :D
my retarded drunk-like semi-conscious chat mate, you know what to do next now?
hahaaaa, let's be social tgt! muahaha

am still alive at 7:37 AM



happy birthday to me :D
(according to hui, today is my first day of seventeen so im allowed to wish myself that. lols)

birthday was good - chilling out with friends and running away from sch work. and oh, so i carried the BIG present all around and earned the most stares i ever got -.- i had to console myself, it's after all my once in a life time picture. hahaha :D wheeee~ unitians.

oh man. seventeen passed just like that, i don't feel that old yet. heck, eighteen, here i come!!!

oh oh, omfg i went swimming today. okay, fine, i can't swim. so, technically i was trying to swim. i mean, who on this earth ever fail to learn swimming; it's either you learned or you don't want to, right? well, i can't -.- freaking float. hahaha, time to use a float. but im freaking 17, helppppp. In any case, at least i'm like, trying :D it's a good way to tan too. haha

if i dont start work soon, i'm so not going to forgive myself after exams.
so, what's freaking wrong, why can't i start?

am still alive at 7:19 AM



booo. i have flu from out of the blue. go away go away.

so many things are hindering my studies though they may not be bad. hc ltc camp was very fun and certainly will be a memorable experience. none of the camps i been to had been so reflective, emphasizing so much on chr development and most importantly bonding. :D mainly, it's so amazing to me because i did much things i know i wouldn't have done or dared to do few years back. i guess i needed to see how much positive thinking can do to actually believe the strength of willpower. it all started with just an additional step on the log, and despite the fact that everyone else went further than i did, it has really helped me. the night trail was fun too, walking in the jungle, pitch dark. first with tess( even though you will not read this, but you make a great partner!) and then alone under the starry starry night. LOLS. how cliche does it sound but it's very nice eh. and many many more things la - trekking with leeches, huge ants and what have you. but i think the highlight would be the camp fire (with only 25 people, can you imagine :D) and the sharing session afterwards. i think every camp should seriously have this session!! it's really warm and fuzzy (: everyone poured out their sincere feelings, it's so hard to explain it here :D all in all, i believe hc can do whatever it is given!!

now it's back to reality and nope, i shall wait till after sun to do proper work :D



am still alive at 9:29 PM



hieeeeeee (:

life's good at the moment and it will suck approximately a week later because i will face consequences for not doing any of my work. till then, i'm still breathing :D

rarr, yelyn's gone for good...good whole two weeks. hahaaa, sorry babe i can't send you off and do tcare :D if you ever see this, that is!

ahhh, i'm keeping myself busy almost all the time (nope, none of them involves work). thurs was day out with unitians. we simply laze around and me getting hyped up over rugby (fine, i was only passing the ball...but still...) and had a swim in the stinky sea (okay okay, i wasn't swimming, i can't). overall, simple day :D dreadful friday it was, at first. i mean, i wanted to sleep till the sun bakes my butt. but, i obediently drag myself up and out to school for drama workshop. and oh my! it turned out so clucking crazy. i mean like, what the cluck! we were all being such mothercluckers la! (inside joke :D) i believe everyone felt somewhat tired after laughing so much and well, sorry babes i didn't do that dare. hey, i have some reputation to keep okay (: i so hope we have more of these "outings" at macs where we laugh till we burst into flames (right, mother?) hahahas. sat, today, SHOP (:

wheeeeeeeee. lovely lovely
hmwk go away go away go away

am still alive at 6:23 AM