i am sweetened to death.
-
`came back late at night, from a not very happy day and a not very happy week.
`saw a strange looking object on my desk.
`a letter?
`it's units polymers' loves.
`a much needed card for my poor soul.
-
xie xie ni men :D
a mixed feeling of joy and sadness. a reminder that someone is there at the present. a trigger of the laughters in the past. this is what happens when a full moon night and a tired somebody come together. this is not emo, just a moment of more-than-usual nostalgia i think. i need to find peace.

from a book:
unexpressed feelings never die. They are buried alive and come forth later in uglier ways.

P.S. sorry rach j i can't see you perform. okay you are not going to read this but you have my support tomorrow.
P.S.S xinyan don't emo okay, throw emo to me la i will catch :D
P.S.S.S thursday is ending, and im waking again.

am still alive at 8:40 AM



sometimes there's no reason to be down. but, do we need one?

am still alive at 5:52 AM



this is bloody exhausting. i trudge on.

//then i am back to sitting on the fence because it's just not right. with rejection comes resignation, and i must learn to embrace what i have, or rather what i don't have. occasional laughs should be seen as treats, and perhaps no longer as hope. we all know that we should eventually pick ourselves up after a fall, it's just that no one says how soon it should be.

am still alive at 6:33 AM



even though i have heard this song so many times on my ipod, it's the first time i took notice of the lyrics. and i think i miss something from the past :(
-
[In this Diary] by The Ataris

Here in this diary,
I write you visions of my summer.
It was the best I ever had.
There were choruses and sing-alongs,
and that unspoken feeling of knowing that right now is all that matters.
All the nights we stayed up talking
listening to 80's songs;
and quoting lines from all those movies that we love.
It still brings a smile to my face.
I guess when it comes down to it...
-
[Chorus]
Being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up:
These are the best days of our lives.
The only thing that matters is just following your heart
and eventually you'll finally get it right.
-
Breaking into hotel swimming pools,
and wreaking havoc on our world.
Hanging out at truck stops just to pass the time.
The black top's singing me to sleep.
Lighting fireworks in parking lots,
illuminate the blackest nights.
Cherry cokes under this moonlit summer sky.
2015 Riverside, it's time to say, "goodbye.
"Get on the bus, it's time to go.


read it (:

am still alive at 5:08 AM



HAPPY NATIONAL DAY (yes im abit late)
school celebration can be considered a blast since it's much better than i expected. what's better than having your float, one that has a tree but looks like a giant vegetable, in third place. i didn't even expect us to win anything because that stupid vegetable, i mean tree, falls off every now and then. there's no place i rather be (at that moment). HAHAHs

and boooo, i watched Disturbia and now, i am convinced that i am truly disturbed.

haha, stupid show laa. it's fated i'm not suited to watch horrors (YES i know it's not one, but it is to me!) not saying the movie is bad, though the plot is abit... ,oh well. i might just have enough thrills for my entire life :D

fish.co dinner was great. units units units, lalala. the balloon man was so cool. suhui your giraffe is... well. yelyn's one is a mass of cells (that's for grabbing my leg during my disturbia storytelling and scaring the hell out of me. LOLS) michelle's wow. well, we all had satisfied tummys and balloons. wheeeeee. again again again, chalet in dec anyone? (:

and and town-ed today with valerie and yixi. Secret was not bad, the plot is better than Disturbia though i partly guessed it. piano skills definitely memerising, is it even real?? fun fun stabbing at val, not literally. val, you know i dont mean it! :D ahhh, great day without school's burdens.
-
-
-
and being a nice person as i am, JAHME i shall mention you! okay i dont know what to say partly because im curbing myself from criticising you :D for a start you can improve by giving SMILE when you are taking a privileged photo with me (the privileged one being uhhs you :D). and then, wave hellos and goodbyes! oh well, that's for now gifted artist!

-
wheeeeeeeeee

am still alive at 9:11 AM



bahhhhhh.
to indulge in potter and freedom writers is heavenly, i think i'm starting to dream about them -.- the bitter part is the snap back to reality. which i, not yet sure happily or sadly, haven't quite accomplish.

just imagine me struggling on the threshold of imaginations.

when one yearns for happy endings, when one expects to have a happy ending, what is then considered a happy one? is it not that humans always think there is a happier ending possible, that the field on the other side is definitely greener and thus happier? then, can the choice to end things while we are still happy count as a happy ending? just pondering.

come 8th aug to see units.
hang on there :D

am still alive at 6:36 AM



a huge fat big "F"uck to this new strain of virus (no, stop running away from me guys, im just joking) that's haunting meeeeeee. whyyyyyyyyy. is this some kind of terminal disease.

what kind of illness comes first with stomach runs, high temperature, stupid nausea, and pre ageing back aches. you tell me, you tell me. huh?! huh!?

i swear the back pain is like a trip to hell, maybe that's why old people hunch. i can't begin to describe how the pain is like, it's utterly gross and excruciating; no human should ever deserve this, seriously.

and worse part of all, this weird attack is making me whine :(




at least MTP was lols. dr chua is so cute -.-

am still alive at 7:01 AM



bahhhh, i'm sick - all out of a sudden.
it's like i wake up this morning and viola! a virus hit me. as much as i hate going to school, i realised sitting at home stoning with a throbbing headache is not exactly what i'm looking for. Thank god i didn't try to find my way to the faraway polyclinic because the trip to the clinic just opposite my block seemed 2987238849 miles away.

booooo :(
for once, while i feel like puking (and i want to), my body disallows me to. so im stuck in a stage whereby i feel nauseous and i can't do anything about it. how sucky is that.

boooo to fever, stomach runs and nausea (and school tomorrow)

am still alive at 6:04 AM